IsRogue Onea good movie? Yes. Is it great? Maybe. And while it comes to, perhaps, the most rousing conclusion of any Star Wars movie to date, it has some big flaws that are hard to overlook. Namely Darth Vader. But we’ll get to that in a minute. While most people won’t bother to read why he’s handled so poorly here, we’ll first admit that he’s fun to watch. And if what he were doing didn’t happen minutes before we see him inStar Wars: A New Hope, it would be some of the best Darth Vader moments we’ve ever witnessed in a movie or TV show.
But, alas, his final scenes inRogue Onehappen just mere minutes before we first meet him in theoriginal 1977 classic, and for whatever reason, he’s just not the same Darth Vader from earlier in the franchise. But perhaps there is a logical reason for that. We’ll get to fan theories a little later, because we’re sureRogue Onewill help spawn a lot of new ones. Before we continue, abandon ship all ye who fear spoilers, because there are going to be a lot of them from this point on.
The story behindRogue Oneis simple enough. In fact, the entire plot is revealed in the opening crawl forA New Hope, giving a third act spoiler nearly forty years in the making. In this Star Wars spin-off, we get to see the Rebels first great victory over the Empire, and boy, is it a doozy. What happened to this regime by the time the Rebels get to the Death Star in a New Hope? Neither side of this space war seems to be holding up their end of the bargain in terms of what happens here. This is a galactic brawl unlike no other ever witnessed in the franchise. And it can’t help but dwarf the iconic climax of the original.
And that may be the biggest problem withRogue One. It’s too big. It’s too ambitious. It’s too full of energy. Basically, it’s everything you want in aStar Warsmovie, but it’s in danger of making the 1977 original kind of suck. It’s nearly impossible to watchRogue OneandA New Hopeback to back. Sure, that’s the intent byDisney and Lucasfilm. One movie seamlessly drifts into the other. The Rebels steal the plans,Princess Leiagets them in her hands, and fans know the rest by heart. But Rogue One now makes A New Hope look like a lethargic lumping beast of boring. It’s like watching The Road Warrior and Fury Road side-by-side. The new, fresh energy of today’s filmmaking techniques simply aren’t on display back decades ago. And it’s jarring to say the least.
But the abundant energy inRogue Oneisn’t the only thing making it awkward in terms of what has become before it. There are a few issues that are hard to over look. Or just simply annoying. The cameos are fun, but some don’t make sense, some feel shoehorned in, and others are hampered by their quality, because, let’s face it, some of the VFX still aren’t where they need to be to pull this off. But that’s where George Lucas' tampering with his old classics might have set a precedent for better things to come. And maybe in a few years, Lucasfilm will revamp some of the flawed VFX imagery here. And yes, we did just call this stunning achievement flawed. While he doesn’t want to be named here, one of the top Star Wars fan leaders reluctantly agreed that perhaps some of the VFX could be improved as technology continues to evolve. You probably know what we’re already getting at before we dive into this.
WatchingRogue One: A Star Wars Story, it’s hard not to get swept away by its grand adventure, its thrilling space battles, and its dark take on the material. There’s a lot of death and destruction in this movie, and if you suspected that none of the new characters make it out alive you’d be right. But we don’t think those are problems at all. Now, what follows are the true things I feelRogue Onegot wrong aboutStar Wars.
15Darth Vader’s intensity doesn’t add up.
Here’s the thing. I remember being in the theater for an advanced preview screening ofAttack of the Clonesbefore the general public got a chance to see it. And the audience went ape poo-doo when Yoda ignited his lightsaber and proceeded to trounce Count Dooku. Then, I was there opening night, with none of the filmmakers or press in attendance. And the scene got a similar standing ovation. People loved it. It was thrilling in the moment. But then a few weeks later, the buzz wore off, and people suddenly had a problem with this scene. It has since become one of the more criticized things in the prequel trilogy. Some hardcore fans absolutely hate this character development in terms of the Jedi master’s overall arc, presumably showing why he was so revered. Twenty-three years pass in the life of Yoda before we see him again, as the aging Jedi Master is too frail to move like he once did when Luke comes calling.
So. Here’s the rub. Darth Vader gets a similar scene inRogue One. He does get to use his lightsaber. And in the moment, it is awesome. The audience was cheering. It brought the house down. But watch A New Hope immediately afterwards, and it’s a definite buzzkill. The Darth Vader we see at the end ofRogue Oneis not the Darth Vader we meet in the opening moments ofA New Hope. In this spin-off, he is full of piss and vinegar. He is ruthless as he kills rebels left and right to get back the Death Star plans. He takes on an army all by himself without even breaking a sweat. But then, literally a few minutes later, switching movies, we see him lumber through the Tantive IV, and he does not kill one rebel soldier with his lightsaber. Instead, he sacrifices the lives of many stormtroopers. Why? He just proved he’s a bad ass that can kill everyone in this hallway. Why doesn’t he continue his reign? It’s not like he storms the Tantive IV slicing everything in sight like the monsterRogue Onemakes him out to be.
We used to think Darth Vader was a bad ass in the opening moments of 1977’sA New Hope. But now he’s a slow moving mellow fellow who comes across pretty nice from what we just saw him do only mere seconds ago. Okay, maybe overlook that. But then later on in the movie, we see him fight Obi-Wan Kenobi, and he moves like an old man who has just gotten off the couch at the nursing home for the first time in years to swing his lightsaber around. He gets winded, quickly, and if Obi-Wan hadn’t of sacrificed himself to save Luke and his friends, we’re almost sure Kenobi could have taken the Sith lord.
How in the hell does Darth Vader at the end ofRogue Onego from a bad ass killing machine to a lumbering giant who mostly relies on his choking powers inA New Hope? Well, I have a theory on that.
I’ll call it the drained battery theory. Perhaps the Bacta tank we see Darth’s limbless body in at the halfway point of Rogue One is giving him renewed energy. He is completely at 100% when he gets out of the bacta tank. Then he drains his energy the more he walks around in that sure to be heavy helmet and cloak. After he kills that squadron of rebels, he’s pretty tired. And with the events of A New Hope moving like they do, perhaps he never gets to climb back into his Bacta tank until his big showdown with Luke Skywalker inEmpire Strikes Back. It could explain the waning lightsabers and the lumbering half-assed moves we’re now forced to contend with inA New Hope. Because the Darth Vader at the end ofRogue One, mind you, meets up with Obi-Wan just a few days later. And there is no way the Darth Vader at the end of Rogue One doesn’t just wipe the floor with Obi Wan, killing him with a few swift strokes before single-handedly taking out the Millennium Falcon. But, alas, he does have to let Luke get away, or the Empire would have never found the hidden Rebel base. So there is that. Again, is anyone bothered by how epic the end ofRogue Oneis when compared to the end ofA New Hope? Just in Tie Fighter numbers alone, they should have been able to wipe out the Rebels small fleet without much effort. But forget that. I’m getting off track. The Darth Vader at the end ofRogue Oneis a slaughtering, all-powerful badass fool. InA New Hope, he has trouble fighting an old man with a stick.Rogue Oneis in danger of making me never want to watch the originalStar Warsagain, and that in itself kind of sucks.
14Overuse of CGI Grand Moff Tarkin and CGI Princess Leia
Robert Downey Jr. Left jaws agape inCaptain America: Civil War, when his pretty young face appeared on screen unblemished by years of hard living. It was the RDJ we remembered from the 80s, as fresh as the day he starred inWeird ScienceandBack to School. Some truly believed VFX had reached the ultimate pentacle, where aging, very old, or even deceased celebrities could be brought back too their prestige heyday.Rogue One, with Lucasfilm and ILM at their side, proves we’re not there yet as they resurrect Peter Cushing from the grave to repriseGrand Moff Tarkinand give Carrie Fisher’s Princess Leia a 19-year-old facelift. The CGI in the movie is amazing. Some of the best ever put on screen. But that doesn’t keep these two beloved characters from looking like video games, or cartoons here in 2016. It’s jarring and it took me directly out of the movie. These characters just don’t look or feel right, and while it’s exciting to see a young Princess Leia, it feels wrong to see her like this. Why not just recast these roles with younger actors? They’re going to do it for Han Solo. The only saving grace is that this technology seems to be improving at an expedient rate. Perhaps George Lucas set the precedence. And a decade from now, LucasFilm and ILM can go back and improve these VFX so that they look more human? Also, the reason Downey looks so good in Civil War? Because he still looks good now, and it doesn’t take much to clear up his aging skin. We’re seeing Downey with a VFX facelift. Here, we’re watching blatantly CGI’d resurrections done through motion capture. And yeah, we can definitely tell the difference.
13Title cards introducing planets isn’t very Star Wars.
Director Gareth Edwards wanted his standaloneStar Warsspin-off to stand out from the previous 7 live-actionStar Warsmovies. So he took a cue from the Ewoks TV movie and abandoned the opening crawl. He gives us a prologue instead that introduces Jyn Erso at a young age as her father Galen is stolen away by the Empire and her mother is shot dead as Bambi, a Disney tradition. That is all well and fine, and works for the movie. But then he goes a step further, doing something no otherStar Warsmovie has done yet. He introduces each planet and location with a title card. That’s okay for some movies, I guess. But it rubbed me the wrong way here. I’ve heard others say they liked this. But the problem is, no other Star Wars movie had to introduce its planets in quite the same way. Sure, we didn’t know the name of the planet Luke had secluded himself on inThe Force Awakensuntil weeks after that movie’s release last year. But that was part of the mystery. Here, like otherStar Warsmovies, we hear the names of these planets mentioned enough times that we know what they are and what they’re called. Especially Jedha and Scarif. We don’t need bothersome title cards that introduce each and every planet. It’s a different kind of sci-fi for a movie that isn’tStar Wars. Sure, it makes this one stand out from the Skywalker saga, but it doesn’t help anything, and sorta takes away from the mystique and vastness of theStar Warsuniverse.
12Walrus Man and Dr. Evazan cameo timeline seems off.
Ok, this is going to be a decisive one, and people will surely rush to its defense. But did we really need to see Ponda Baba (a.k.a. “Walrus Man”) and Dr. Cornelius Evazan (Mr. “I don’t like you either!") on the moon of Jedha? This cameo is the very definition of fan service, which there is a lot of inRogue One. But it’s not that they’re in the movie that is so bothersome. It’s what happens shortly after we see the pair walking down a road. I don’t know about Ponda, but the Dr. is wasted. They bump into Jyn, Cassian and K-2SO, do their little song and dance, and then go on their way. They seem to be enjoying some off time on Jedha, a Jedi holy planet. What they’re doing there? Who nows, doesn’t necessarily look or sound like a place these two miscreants would hang out. But whatever, that’s not the problem. The area is heavily secured by Imperial Forces who are checking everyone’s I.D. So coming and going looks about as fun as crossing the border of Mexico and infiltrating a police state. But then, well, all hell breaks out. And then, a big portion of this planet is blown to smithereens. Let’s say the Empire doesn’t mind wiping out their patrolling troops. The Stormtroopers are as bad a shot as ever. But I find it hard to believe that with what goes down on Jedha allowed for these two to get out and get to Mos Eisely just a few days later. Sure, maybe they were on their way to their ship. And they abandoned the planet ASAP. But I’m more inclined to believe that they died in the after math of everything that goes down on Jeddha. Hopefully I’m proven wrong, and there is some kind of comic book or novel that gives us the backstory on how these two got off the explosive, planet of doomed Jedha and to the Mos Eisely Space Port. PerhapsStar Wars Rebelscan address it in one of their future episodes?
11C-3PO and R2-D2 quickly shoehorned in for fan service.
Ok, so this isn’t a Skywalker family saga sequel, or anything like that. So there really isn’t much of a place forC-3PO and R2-D2story-wise. But we know the iconic droid pair are around someplace. And yup, there they are, on Yavin 4. Rogue One doesn’t break the tradition, leaving the droids out. Though, they are relegated to the sidelines, and only get a few minutes of screentime. Perhaps 90 seconds. At that, they feel shoehorned in, and their scene does nothing to advance the story. Sure, it allows the audience to howl loudly and applaud, but because of that, you can’t even hear C-3PO’s one line of dialogue. They are just quick window dressing hung as an easy Easter egg to point and marvel at. It’s a speedy cameo that could be cut from the movie, and no one would ever know the difference. But their cameo on Yavin 4 also calls into question just why they were on Tantive IV and how they got there. I’m sure there is some logical explanation, but something about it doesn’t quite sit right. We see Tantive IV heading into battle during the big climactic end fight scene. Why not have their cameo there, if have it at all? Just to be able to keep saying that 3PO and R2 are the only characters to be in everyStar Warsmovie? Meh.
10Cassian coming back to life after his big fall… just in time to save Jyn.
Is Cassian a slasher in a horror movie? Cause he sure comes back from the dead like one. It’s obvious that the ending was changed watching this movie. And it seems like Cassian really should have died during his big long fall that saw his head smashed against a couple of metal beams more than once. The broken ribs alone would have kept him from being able to raise his blaster, let alone shoot it. Unless his race have plexiglass bones, or something? There is a scene in the second trailer, which I’ll get to in a second, that hints Cassian really did die in that fall. And that Jyn also met her demise in a completely different way than what we see play out here. In the original cut, these two did not die starring off into the sunset of Scarif as the Death Star demonstrated its immense powers. But the ending was changed for whatever reason, and because of this, Cassian got to live a little while longer, only to die again seconds later. But not before killing main bad guy Orson Krennic, who succumbs to the fallacy of the talking killer, the cliche of all cliches. It will be interesting to see how the original ending played out, which we’re sure to learn in the days following Rogue One’s release. Which brings us to our next item on the table.
9Jyn faces off against a Tie Fighter
Were you waiting forJyn Erso’s climatic duel with a Tie Fighter? I sure was. As it was the money shot in the second full-length trailer that was released. And part of that scene is still intact, so you have reason to be waiting for it. But it’s one of what is possibly many scenes cut from the movie. Who was in the Tie Fighter? Was it Krennic? Did he gun down Jyn in cold blood? Or did a X-Wing Fighter save her at the last minute? Or was this Cassian, who still survived his fall in the original cut, coming to rescue her the same way Chewbacca and the Ewoks did at the end of Return of the Jedi, when they seemingly had Han Solo and Princess Leia cornered with their stolen AT-ST Scout Walker? Rogue One already has kind of an ‘end of Jedi’ feel too it. Perhaps this scene was just a little too on the nose. Whatever it is, it was a disappointment to see it missing. And they are still using it in the TV spot running heavily right now.
8Missing Darth Vader footage
And speaking of deleted scenes, the firstDarth Vaderfootage that audiences were shown in the second trailer, where he stands agains a red screen, is missing too. Which means there was more Darth Vader to go around. Yes, the trailer serves as proof that some Darth Vader scenes got cut out of the movie as well. Perhaps because he was old and slow in these scenes that matched up with A New Hope, and the Disney brass didn’t like that? It’s obvious that Darth Vader’s big gotcha moment at the end of the movie was tacked on at the last minute. But it would have still been cool to get some of these missing scenes in the movie. Perhaps we’ll get to see them when the Blu-ray comes out. Though, there are scenes in The Force Awakens trailer that we still haven’t seen, that have skipped two different home releases. This movie could have used more old school Vader. Too bad, it looks like that all wound up on the cutting room floor.
7Everyone in the Rogue One gang bonds a little too quickly…
This is a gripe that has been heard a lot. But it sure seems like Jyn and her crew come together a little too swiftly. It’s rushed along, and the ragtag gang of lovable scamps is only in place to service the story. While it’s sad when they all die, we don’t ever really feel that any of the core Rogue One team members were truly friends. Sure, Jyn and Cassian get a few nice moments there at the end, but did they care if Chirrut and Baze passed away? Did they care f-all about poor Bodhi Rook? Maybe the point is that they all came together out of necessity not any kind of camaraderie or friendship. And that certainly appears to be the case. Problem, we don’t get the same feeling from these characters that we did when Obi-Wan, Han, Luke, Chewbacca, Leia and the droids all formed their little family. When it comes down to it, it’s not supposed to feel that way I suppose. Instead, it feels oddly economic and devoid of emotion. It’s hard to get attached to or care about any of these new guys the same way we do other characters in the previous movies. This gang of new characters is all fodder for the Imperial death machine. They make a great sacrifice. But I wish we felt more for them. Instead, the end comes like a quick game of ten little Indians. You can only shrug and think, ‘Whelp, that’s too bad. So sad. Let’s see, who buys it next?’
6Where are Porkins and Biggs?
Maybe I’m missing something in the Star Wars folklore or canon. But the raid on the Death Star presumably took place not even a week after the Rebel raid on Scarif. So where the heck are Porkins and Biggs during this big space battle that endsRogue One? They go out of their way to show us Jon “Dutch” Vander (a.k.a. Red Leader) and X-Wing pilot Garven “Dave” Dreis (a.k.a. Gold Leader) in the fight against the shield gate. And it appears that the Rebels have drug their entire army out of hiding for this raid. Are Porkins and Biggs sitting back on Yavin 4, letting their pals die? Are they second stringers? Where the heck are they? Well, we know from some deleted scenes that never made it into A New Hope that Biggs could very well be on Tatooine with Luke Skywalker during this big battle. Or maybe Gareth Edwards and his team just didn’t want to overload with cameos and Easter eggs. But the return of Porkins would have brought the house down. Where the hell else will he ever show up in aStar Warsmovie but here? This is a big missed opportunity.
