One can never fully know when a song or a phrase or anything, really, will truly take off. I could be wrong, but I doubt screenwriter Adam Herz imagined his throwaway MILF line in his 1999 comedy American Pie would spiral into infamy. Don’t be surprised if, later this year, you start seeing #BamSnap pop up all over social media, because if the hilariously off-kilterBloodsucking Bastardsis as big a hit as I know it could be, then you’re witnessing the birth of the next great buzzword.
WhileBloodsucking Bastardsdoes not have a release date set at this time (it was picked up by Shout! Factory after debuting at Slamdance in January), I had the good fortune of seeing this with a packed crowed at the Arclight Hollywood on Monday. I hope you get to see this as soon as humanly possible because this romp is such a sheer delight, a rare horror-comedy that handles both genres incredibly well in a tightly-paced and efficient manner. If you’re the type who prefers hybrid movie comparisons like “The Matrix meets Dune” (I’ve actually heard that… for real…), then try this on for size:Bloodsucking Bastardsis basically the offspring of a drunken orgy between Office Space (or Workaholics), Super Troopers and a group of vampires (not the sparkly kind). Or, to put it more succinctly,Bloodsucking Bastardshits the succulent sweet spot in the Venn diagram of comedy and horror.
The always affable Fran Kranz stars as Evan, the one guy at the office who actually takes his job seriously. While he impatiently awaits a big promotion to Sales Manager (from “Acting” Sales Manager), his slacker best friend and co-worker Tim (Joey Kern) spends most of his “work” time playing various games with cube-mates Andrew (Justin Ware) and Mike (Neil Garguilo). To top it off, Evan’s girlfriend Amanda (Emma Fitzpatrick), also the office HR manager, dumps him after he utters quite possibly the most hilarious response to “I love you” ever. Then, things really take a turn for the worse.
Evan’s boss Ted (Joel Murray) announces that outside-hire Max (Pedro Pascal) has been named the new Sales Manager, not only dashing Evan’s hopes of a promotion, but forcing him to work under his old collegiate nemesis. When bodies start piling up at the office, Evan comes to realize that Max is actually a vampire, turning his co-workers into these bloodsucking bastards to make a more efficient workforce. With the help of Tim and a super-militant security guard named Frank (Marshall Givens), Evan tries to take his beloved office back, by any means necessary.
Fran Kranz’s progression from mildly-stressed office worker to vampire slayer is fantastic to watch. Emma Fitzpatrick plays the pissed-off girlfriend to perfection, and Joey Kern knocks it out of the park as Tim, whose made-up catch-phrase “Bam Snap” grows on the audience just as quickly as it does with the characters on screen. Pedro Pascal is wonderful as the boss you love to hate, even before you know he’s a vampire, while Joel Murray excels as Ted, who is just trying to turn this office around.
What’s great is screenwriters Ryan Mitts and the improv comedy troupe Dr. God (comprised of director Brian James O’Connell and stars Neil Garguilo, Justin Ware, Sean Cowhig and David Park) introduce these characters as familiar archetypes, before turning them upside down. David Park’s David is the perfect example. We first meet him in the office break room as a smarmy but harmless guy who just wants to collect everyone’s money from the NCAA office pool. For all intents and purposes, he’s this movie’s Milton from Office Space, but when David “turns,” his casual requests to pay up turn into sinister shakedowns in the blink of an eye. Their script also gives characters like David, Marshall Givens' Frank, Zabeth Russell’s Elaine, Yvette Yates' Zabeth and Sean Cowhig’s Janitor much more meat on the proverbial bone than you’d see in most movies, turning even the smallest of roles into memorable turns.
Directed with verve and precision by Brian James O’Connell (Angry White Man), it’s almost shocking thatBloodsucking Bastardsonly runs 87 minutes. There is so much nuance to story than you would imagine, with O’Connell delivering a taut, hilarious and thrilling story with more blood than you can shake a wooden stake (or the blade of those big paper cutter things) at.Bloodsucking Bastardsis a special kind of horror comedy that both goes for the jugular and tickles your funny bone in delightfully inventive ways, while giving us the next big catch-phrase to boot. Bam snap!
